Last weekend I attended the funeral of the father of my good friend. The church was packed with hundreds and hundreds of people. It may sound funny, but I find attending funerals to be very meaningful. This time is a difficult time for friend, as he was very close to his father. I felt that it was important to be at the funeral to support my friend. But from a selfish point of view, attending the funeral gave me a chance to reflect on death. Thinking about death has helped me to improve my business and my life. Here’s why.
Death Reminds Me that Life is Finite and Focus is Necessary
During my 20’s I had no reason to think about death. I was young, healthy, energetic, optimistic, and felt like I was invincible and could conquer the world. I felt like I had all the time in the world. Now that I’m in my mid-30’s I lived through some health issues like arthritis and depression. I have uncles and aunts with serious health issues. The parents of my friends are starting to pass away. I am feeling more human and fragile. I have a deeper sense that my life is finite.
The reality that our life is limited is what amplifies the meaningfulness of our decisions and actions. Imagine if we never died – we would have all the time in the world to do the things that we want. It would not matter so much what we did today, because there would always be a tomorrow. It is the fact that there may not be a tomorrow that gives our life choices weight. It is the fact that there may not be a tomorrow that invites us to choose carefully and to live intentionally. Death reminds me that life is finite and focus is necessary.
Death Reminds Me of the Potential that My Work Can Have a Lasting Impact
I’ve heard the argument that when you are lying on your deathbed and think about what’s important in your life, you think about your relationships and not your work. The line of thinking states that the words you won’t say on your deathbed are, “If only I had spent more time at the office.” This argument is used to remind people that their work doesn’t matter as relationships. I think that may be true if you believe that the work that you do does not truly matter.
The funeral I attended last weekend had many stories – stories from people who knew my friend’s father and spoke of the impact he had on their life. My friend’s father was a pastor, and his work was caring for people. The many people that attended knew my friend’s father because of his work. In fact, my friend’s father has had cancer for almost 10 years and in spite of his poor health, he made it a priority to continue his work because he believed that it was important.
Being at the funeral reminded me that my work can also have a lasting impact. My work in marketing is not just about making my customers richer, it is about caring for them as individuals and helping them live out their calling through their business. I chose to focus on this work because I felt like it was meaningful and could have a lasting impact. And when I lie on my death bed, I want to feel satisfied that I had invested the time that I did on my work.
Death Reminds Me to Think about My Legacy
One piece of advice that I have heard repeatedly by consultants, life coaches, and leaders is that ask yourself, “How do you want to be remembered?” That’s what I thought about during the funeral. What are the stories I want to be shared at my funeral?
My focus is usually spent on the daily demands on life – customer deadlines, proposals to write, phone calls to make, dishes to wash, kids to play with, diapers to change, and the list goes on and on. Sometimes I get to think about next week’s priorities or next month’s priorities. But rarely do I think about my life as a whole – the 60 or 70 or 80 years that I will live and the legacy I will leave behind.
What is legacy? Legacy is what you leave behind after you die. Legacy could be property or money or debt. Legacy could also be relationships, whether health or unhealthy. Legacy could also be a business or a brand. Legacy is the sum of the influence of your life. In terms of business and work, I think about how I can do work that will last beyond my life.
Death reminds me to think about the meaning of my life and what type of legacy I leave behind.